And the fact that I can't walk into a room full of people and start ranting at them is one of the reasons why I feel like the worlds worst mother sometimes. I just know I would freeze up.
The fact is- if the school can control his behaviour enough for it not to cause them problems they don't really give a fuck about his emotional needs. I'm going to find out what I can about the law in the Uk regarding IEPs and tell the school I will be contacting an advocacy service as a first step to getting this sorted.