I may be part of the "in crowd" and just be completely oblivious to the fact, its happened to me a few times before (like when I was randomly made into a mod on WP). I think most people who label others as being part of the "in-crowd" are just kinda paranoid and looking for an excuse to lash out at someone personally.
I dunno, I've had most success in my life by ignoring the concept of social standing and finding ways to work around it personally. I'm not above or below anyone, I'm just sorta off to the side.