I have a question for Callaway: My baby died yesterday, and of course I am still grieving, but how long should I wait before adopting a new cat? I have lots of love to give to a fluffy friend and so does my son. I was thinking that having a new cat to love might fill the empty hole that is in my heart. It might distract me from all the crying. I was thinking about adopting a young cat that has been abandoned so that we can turn my tragedy and his into some love.
While I understand that the temptation after the death of a pet may be to run out and get another one right away and that people are often encouraged to do so by family and friends, and although it may sound like a good idea, I think that you should be careful about getting one too soon. I think that you need to take some time to grieve first.
As you said, you lost a baby, a member of the family, and you need to come to terms with that loss before adopting a new member of the family.
How would you advise me if I just lost a baby? I think that you would advise me to come to terms with my devastating loss before having or adopting another baby, wouldn't you?
This new cat deserves to be loved for himself or herself, not just as a replacement cat for the one that is gone. He or she will need lots of energy and attention, which at some point you will be ready and able to give, but not now. Your heart needs to heal first.
I think that you need to be especially careful about replacing the cat too soon because of your son. You don't want to send a message to a child that says when something is lost all you have to do is buy another one, when in reality, that is often not the case. It also devalues the significance of the cat who just died.
I don't think that there is a specific amount of time that needs to pass, but I think you will know when you and your son are both ready. If there is any doubt at all, then wait a little longer.