My new baby

[GalileoAce]

I'm already 21 though. how many 21 yr olds have never even had a gf yet? iif i wait till I'm 30 then who is gonna want someone at the age of 30 who's still stuck where i am? 

i do genuinely like people, just they're always the ones that are outta my league

FYI, I was 22 when I met renaeden in person. She was 28. I've known of people who meet when they're 40, or even 50. Age doesn't matter.

Waiting is not the answer. If you wait you go nowhere. You need to live you life as renaeden said. Start living, doing something, something you enjoy. Enjoy the relationships that come and go. If you're waiting you won't be doing anything, you won't be meeting new people.
But it's no guarantee that you will ever find someone. You need to accept that. You may never find someone to be with.

No one is out of your league. There are no leagues. That's just dating bullshit. Ignore it. If you like someone try to make friends. And work from there. If they're not interest that's their loss.

[Phlexor]

I'm already 21 though. how many 21 yr olds have never even had a gf yet? iif i wait till I'm 30 then who is gonna want someone at the age of 30 who's still stuck where i am?  

i do genuinely like people, just they're always the ones that are outta my league

Think of it this way. How many people go out and get a Ferrari as their first or second car? Dating should be like that. You don't always start out with what you want, but you need a few to practice on.

A lot of aspies fuck up their first relationships in a major way, we just have no idea and do some pretty stupid shit. Get that out of the way before you meet that person who is the one for you.

[renaeden]

^Yes. I feel like about some of the stuff I did in my first relationship.

[Adam]

i hadn't thought of that. probably should have, as if someone's gonna fuck up a relationship, it's gonna be me  

What does out of your league mean?

You may have heard this before but being happy with yourself frees up time for you to be happy with someone else as well.

Tbh I wonder why you seem to be in such a rush. Have you plans for anything else while you are waiting?

i mean out of my league as in i only like girls who are super super hot and NT. those kinda girls are never into geeky awkward aspie guys
i'm not in a rush exactly, just that i'm 21 now and have never had a gf in my life. i like girls, so i want one. like with anything i like i guess. i mean most people have had at least one relationship by the time they get to my age.

also i still don't know what i'm doing when i leave uni. and that's next year. university is my best opportunity for meeting someone. after that, i might not be able to again

how the fuck did this thread get onto my failure of a life?  

[GalileoAce]

how the fuck did this thread get onto my failure of a life?  

It's not a failure. You have to work at it for it to be a failure. At the moment it's more latent potential


I'm not sure that's worded correctly...

[Adam]

i guess i need to try harder then

[GalileoAce]

i guess i need to try harder then

Or don't try as hard... Don't need to try, just do your thing. Be you. You're pretty cool and awesome as you are no need changing it, in my opinion.

[Celticgoddess]

i guess i need to try harder then

Or don't try as hard... Don't need to try, just do your thing. Be you. You're pretty cool and awesome as you are no need changing it, in my opinion.

I agree. The times I've come across cool people I ended up dating were the times I wasn't looking. I was focusing on myself, doing things I enjoyed, wasn't looking for anyone and then it just sort of happened. For me, all of my relationships started off as friendships first. The times I got lonely and went looking, it never happened. Damnit. I was lonely too. Woulda been nice.

[GalileoAce]

The times I've come across cool people I ended up dating were the times I wasn't looking. I was focusing on myself, doing things I enjoyed, wasn't looking for anyone and then it just sort of happened. For me, all of my relationships started off as friendships first. The times I got lonely and went looking, it never happened. Damnit. I was lonely too. Woulda been nice.

Yeah! I didn't know if it was just me and renaeden, but we weren't looking for a relationship when we met...We'd both sorta given up and moved on to more interesting things

[Phlexor]

I wasn't looking for a relationship when I met my wife. But that was a conscious decision at the time in an attempt to make myself more attractive by not being desperate.

Guess it worked.

[Adam]

everyone says that

but i've been "not looking" for ages and now here i am and bored of it

women don't like me whether i'm looking or not  

i need some way of getting one

maybe i should take up smoking

[Celticgoddess]

Absolutely not! No smoking for you mister! *she says in her Mum voice*

[Celticgoddess]

The times I've come across cool people I ended up dating were the times I wasn't looking. I was focusing on myself, doing things I enjoyed, wasn't looking for anyone and then it just sort of happened. For me, all of my relationships started off as friendships first. The times I got lonely and went looking, it never happened. Damnit. I was lonely too. Woulda been nice.

Yeah! I didn't know if it was just me and renaeden, but we weren't looking for a relationship when we met...We'd both sorta given up and moved on to more interesting things

I need to remember my own advice. I keep saying i'm not ready for a relationship yet but if the right guy came along, I wouldn't turn him down.

[Adam]

a lot of cute girls smoke though

and it gives you an excuse just to hang around and talk to them

how else do you talk to women?

kidnap them?

[Celticgoddess]

My rule of thumb is to try not to do anything that will give you cancer or a criminal record.

I think you need to join a special interest group. We talked about this over the summer. See what's happening on campus that you enjoy and join a group. Or spend more time in the library. You can chat up girls there too.